America/AlfredXReader - The Amazing Spider-Alfred!

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You grunted sleepily as Alfred draped his lanky, heavy, body over your blanket covered form. "(_Naaammmeee_)! Get uuuupppp!" He wrapped one arm around your half-awake self, snuggling into your back. His voice was whiny and loud in your ear. "Let's go to the moviiieeessss!"

Gracelessly, you tried to shove him away as you rubbed the sleep from your eye. "No Alfred, I'm sleeping…" With an incredible about of nonchalance and strength, you tugged the blanket from under your pestering boyfriend and back onto your body. You heard as Alfred tumbled off of your queen sized bed and onto the bedroom floor, but that doesn't matter, you were going back to sleep.

As you were trying to lull yourself back into dreamland, your stubborn boyfriend had crawled underneath the bed, popping out on the other side of the bed where you where laying. He scooted his body up to you until his face was an inch away from yours with his chin resting on top of the sheets.

"Aw, come on babe," he continued to whimper. "It's Spiderman! Who doesn't want to go see Spiderman?!"

With your eyes still closed you turned away from the American with smell breath. "Me," you mumbled into the pillow. You were so exhausted from cleaning all day(Alfred had a 'Bros' Day' with Matthew while you were at work. And lets just say that when you came home, there was syrup and ketchup everywhere.) and all you wanted to do was sleep until the end of time. "I saw every single movie that led up to 'The Avengers' with you, and last time I checked; Peter Parker was never an Avenger."

He leaned over and shook you vigorously with both hands. "Oh my gawd (_Name_), that's not the poooiiinnnttt!"

With an empty, irritated voice you said, "I swear to god Alfred, if you drag out one more word like that again, I am going to break up with you."

He must have been shaken by your threat because he was quite for a while. You pretended too sleep as you listened to the sound of Alfred slowly getting off of the floor. His weight made the bed dip as he sat down, still being unsettlingly quiet.

Your heart nearly broke as you heard Alfred's muffled, pouting voice(his head was probably in his hands). "I jus' wanted to go out with you tonight. It seems like forever ago since we had a night up with jus' the two of us…"

A pregnant paused filled the air between you, neither of you moving an inch. Now paralyzed by the awkwardness in the air, you stared at the wall while laying completely still.

"… What time is this stupid movie?"

"YEAH!" Alfred leaped from the bed, cheering up to the ceiling. "Spiderman! Nanananana-"

"Honey, stop it. That's Batman…"

Your eyebrows shot up in surprise as you were handed your 3D glasses. "Wow, Al. Why are your ticket prices for 3D movies so high?"

Alfred struggled to open the covering as soon as he got his hands on it. Finally giving up with using his hands, he tore at the plastic packaging. He spit out the leftovers of it from his mouth when it was finally open. "Uhhhm… the recession?"

You tried to hold back a smile as you rolled your eyes. "Whatever."

"Hey, (_Name_)? How come you didn't want to see this movie?" He asked as he slipped his 3D glasses over his regular spectacles.

"Because of the recession?" You resisted the urge to grin smugly at Alfred's disapproving face. You gave him an indifferent shrug. "I don't know. Maybe it's because they came out with like, eight Spiderman movies? And now I'm supposed to get all hyped up because they casted this new guy?"

"Aw come on!" He grabbed your hand, pulling you along as he made his way to the snack stand. "They only came out with five of them."

"That's way too many for one superhero… Unless it was Iron man." With a sudden urge too squeal due to your fangirlness, you wiggled a bit. "He can make all of the movies he wants too…Oh! But uh…yeah… those are… my reasons…" You trailed off self-consciously.

He apparently was not listening to you because he didn't seem to notice your small rant on Robert Downey Jr. as he turned and smiled at you. "Want me to open em, (_Name_)?" He pointed at the still wrapped 3D glasses.

"Nah, I got it." You swiftly and smoothly opened the wrappings around your glasses with one tug. You never noticed the surprised and slightly embarrassed look Alfred gave you.

After the movie was over, Alfred walked ahead of you, nosily sipping at the very last of his soda. His face drawn into an angry pout as he stopped outside of the theater room. You didn't notice though, because you were too blinded by the hearts that were in your eyes.

"Oh…my…god…" you sighed in a dreamlike daze. "That actor… he was so… oh my god."

Alfred shoved his hand into his pants pocket as he watched with a sour look on his face, as you approach him. "He was alright," he mumbled crossly. His lips never left the straw as he glared past you.

Your eyes widened in disbelief. "Just 'Alright'? He was great!" Alfred and you walked out of the movies together, you with a infatuated skip in your step and Alfred with a sulky slouch in his. As the warm night air washed over you both, you continued to rant. "He was so cute and quirky. And how he and Gwen acted together was sooo awkward, it was adorable!" Alfred continued to keep his mouth shut as you both walked in the car. "Not to mention that his spandex suit- oh dear lord, that spandex suit." You brought your hands up and cupped your cheeks, in embarrassment yet your smile next left your face. "Excuse my language but… His ass; was rocking!"

When you both finally get into Al's car was when he finally said something under his breath. "My ass'd rockin' too if I wore spandex with butt pads…"

"Don't ruin my new celebrity crush by saying his butt is fake! What if I told you that Kim Kardashian was all pads and fillers?"

Alfred gave an indignant squawk as he started up the car. "D-dude! That's mean!"

"Well then be quiet about the new hunk in Hollywood." You crossed your arms are give the blond a look that said 'Try to say something else'.

Al pouted as he backed the car up out of the parking space. "I'm just saying that spandex don't make the man…"

You scoffed. "Pft, as if. Name one hero that doesn't wear a skintight suit."

You hummed to yourself as you poured yourself a bowl of cereal. You were at home alone today because Alfred had to run over to Kiku's for some mini project. You didn't ask because the less you knew the safer you knew you were. Carrying your bowl into the living room, you walked over to the couch where your laptop was innocently sitting. The screen was currently on a tumblr page that was covered with Andrew Garfield's face. Yep, you were totally obsessing over him now and the perfect place for obsessions was tumblr.

You scooped cereal into your mouth as you scrolled endlessly, enjoying this man's face. The sound of the front door unlocking and opening behind you didn't even make you get up. "'ey Al," you gargled around your food, eyes glued to the electronic device. "Did ja have fun at, Kiku's?"

"Sure did," he answered. You could feel the air shift as he walked closer, his feet were… squeaking?

Now with a newfound curiosity, you turned in your seat on the couch. The sight of Alfred made you spit and choke on your breakfast treat all at once. "A-Al?! What are you wearing?"

Alfred stood with a wide legged stance, in front of you. His chest was puffed out and his hips were resting on his red, spandex clad hips with spider web pattern. He was heard to toe in an actual Spiderman suit. It looked almost exactly like the one in the movie you saw a few days ago. He even had the mask.

"I'm wearing mine and Kiku's project," he said through the mask, sounding smug. "You like?" He flexed his muscles, the suit pronouncing every crevasse and bulge.

You only managed to flap your mouth open in close in response. This seemed to please him for he waltzed his tight little bod right over to you. You sat frozen as your masked boyfriend came over to you with powerful strides. When he finally reached you, he put his hand on the back of the couch so that he loomed over you so that you were staring at your own reflection in the mask's eye coverings. He then reached up from the back of his neck and pulled his mask off until you were looking into deep, smoldering, blue eyes.

"… Take off the suit."

Alfred blinked, looking hurt. "What? But I thought you-"

You stopped him there. Grabbing him by the back of his neck you pulled him to you until he was literally on top of you. "I love the suit, Al," you whispered seductively in his ear as you caressed his broad shoulders, your hands sliding across the rubber. "It's so, sexy. But I want you naked. Now."

He shot up out of your grasp, already clutching at his suit, preparing to take it off. "Yeeeesssss!…" Alfred felt around on his body for several more seconds, seeming completely frantic and helpless.

You bit your lip in fake innocence and glazed up at the clumsy hero passionately through your lowered eyelashes. You let out a low purr, "What's the hold up, Spiderman?"

"…" Alfred gave you a helplessly, discouraged look. "I don't know how to get this off…"